"What If I Don't Like My Brother?"

April 24, 2024 | By Chuck

  For the last several weeks my articles have focused on addressing questions some may have. I’d like to continue that theme with another question. "What if I don’t like my brother?" The question specifically refers to a brother or sister in Christ. You worship with him or her and may even attend Bible class with them. Maybe you are in a small group with this brother or sister. But you just do not like him or her.

            If an incident occurred between you two that has caused hard feelings, I would encourage a face-to-face meeting to resolve the conflict. It is Biblical to go to your brother to seek reconciliation. (Matthew 5:23-24, Matthew 18:15)  At times it’s not a specific incident that separated brothers or sisters in Christ. Sometimes brothers and sisters struggle with each other because of a difference in personality. Not everyone has the same personality and not every personality works well together. Whatever the reason, the reality is unfortunately sometimes brothers and sisters don’t like each other. So, what do you do with that?

            I do not believe that brothers and sisters in Christ must be best friends, but I do believe that you are family whether you like each other or not. You better love each other. “Whoever says he is in the light and hates his brother is still in darkness. Whoever loves his brother abides in the light, and in him there is no cause for stumbling. But whoever hates his brother is in the darkness and walks in the darkness, and does not know where he is going, because the darkness has blinded his eyes.” (I John 2:9-11) John explains well that we must love our brothers and sisters to be in the light and being in the light is being saved in Christ. So, hating your brother will hinder your spiritual progress and affect your eternal destination.

            If you don’t like your brother, why? Will your dislike for your brother turn to hatred? Could it? Is it worth the risk? Why not humble yourself and make the effort to get to know your brother or sister better? The goal is not to be best friends but to be family; brothers and sisters in Christ who live in God’s light and long for heaven.

Chuck Ball